Category Archives: Summer of Dad

#SummerofDad 14: (Almost) Everything I Learned in the Last 12 Weeks

Gabe and I will see you a little further down the line!

Gabe and I will see you a little further down the line!

And the last installment of #SoD finds me posting from my actual home, in Baltimore, after driving ~3,300 miles and flying cross-country to Seattle and back all in 12 short-but-sometimes-long weeks. All told, Gabe and I visited or traveled through nine states (Maryland, Delaware, Philadelphia, New Jersey, Connecticut, Rhode Island, Massachusetts, Maine, and Washington). What’s odd though, is that on Wednesday I was relieved of the primary parenting duty and I’ve gone primary-parenting cold turkey. (Jenny and Gabe stayed in New York,  as I had school meetings on Wednesday and Thursday). Some observations about going cold turkey:

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#SummerofDad 13: Coming in Loud and Clear

Rrrraaaaaaawwwwwwrrrr! (Photo credit: Julie Miesionczek)

Rrrraaaaaaawwwwwwrrrr! (Photo credit: Julie Miesionczek)

Week 13 finds us in Seattle, staying amongst family and long-time friends, at the tail end of our summer-long trek. We’re here for another couple of days, enjoying the Pacific Northwest’s amazing sunny, cool summer. For touring, we’ve been to Discovery Park, Pike Place Market, the Chihuly Art Museum and the Central branch of the Seattle Public Library—all of which are great (except that Pike Place Market, which was a bit infested with tourists at the moment, but is probably great on a grey October day).

In the world of Gabe, you don’t have to be his primary parent to know that this is the week that he discovered his voice. And that he can be loud. And soft. But mostly loud. Fun!

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#SummerofDad Week 12: A Week of Many Surprises

 

Gabe manages to spread his food everywhere. Notice the lack of rice on his face.

Gabe manages to spread his food everywhere. Notice the lack of rice on his face.

Greetings from Leavenworth, WA, for those of you keeping track of our whereabouts on your Rand McNally US Atlas and/or Google Map. It’s a quaint, German-themed touristy town about two-ish hours East of Seattle, nestled in a small valley in the Cascades. It’s gorgeous and warm (highs in the 90s-100s). We’re at another theater-based retreat, on the grounds of the lovely Icicle Creek Center for the Arts. Unfortunately, I have little or no babysitting help out here, so I am the de facto parent all day. And this week Gabe has made some spectacular developmental leaps—mostly in the psychological sphere.

And by “psychological sphere,” I mean he’s either been deliberately sabotaging my efforts to keep things somewhat clean/orderly or he’s really hitting his stride as a toddler. I think, based on the smirk and twinkle in his eyes and the cackling laugh, it’s the former and not the ladder. Also, I’m basing this on the fact that he’s now got some opinions and is being “difficult” at times, generally about what he wants to eat and when. The answer to this week’s question What does Gabe want to eat? is: berries. Of only the blue-, straw-, or rasp- varieties. And everything else might as well be poison or a toy. In any case, these two facts point to what I’m fairly sure is a growing craftiness of the practical joke variety—which I would normally wholeheartedly endorse. But it’s been a long week and it’s only Friday. How long of a week?

Here’s an incomplete list of Gabe’s exploits in the last 24-hours, complete with attempted silver linings:

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#SummerofDad Week 11: Small Moments and Part 2 of an Interview with Ben Bui, SAHD

Gabe enjoying some fresh-picked, Maine raspberries.

Gabe enjoying some fresh-picked, Maine raspberries.

We wrapped up a week at the Jenny’s parent’s house, sadly departing our lovely lakeside retreat in Maine. Which is all to say, we’re on the road again, this time to NYC and then Seattle for almost two weeks. But the time in Maine was relaxing, as Gabe’s schedule was split between three adults (a great ratio for childcare), and I reflected a bit on my time being the primary parent.

One of the best parts about being the primary parent is that you get to witness, and sometime be the agent of, the small changes in your child’s behaviors and actions. They might start using a spoon as a tool (like, to eat) instead a toy (like, a yogurt catapult). Or maybe they learn to close a door or can identify their head (shoulders, knees, and/or toes).

And for some reason, I really love these small moments. I find them precious. And I mean “precious” in the literal meaning, “of great value,” not like how some creepy adults say it, He’s just so precious!, with its Gollem-like undertone of I’m-going-to-steal-your-baby-now. In any case, these small moments are the most special to me because they’re all around and constantly happening with young kids, if you keep your eyes open. The problem is that they’re so fleeting and near impossible to grasp and hold on to in any meaningful way.

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#SummerofDad Week 10: Double-feature: Why I’ve Grown to Love Primary Parenting, and Part 1 of An Interview with Ben Bui, SAHD

Today’s installment of #SoD is, as the title says, a double-feature: a quick post from me and then the first part of a very long, but honest and in-depth interview with a friend who, just this summer, went from being a successful lawyer at a bank in Austin, TX to a full-time Stay-at-Home-Dad (SAHD) in Dublin, Ireland. I hope you enjoy both posts! Continue reading “#SummerofDad Week 10: Double-feature: Why I’ve Grown to Love Primary Parenting, and Part 1 of An Interview with Ben Bui, SAHD” »

#SummerofDad Week 9: Food & Fun Games

IMG_20150721_081455We’re now wrapping up our last week at the Eugene O’Neill Theater Center, or as I’ve come to know it: our seaside mansion escape. Our stay has been wonderful and I’m somewhat concerned that Gabe will go into withdrawal, as the energetic, gregarious extrovert won’t have dozens of people to wave and smile at or have rolling lawns to frolic upon. But considering we—as in only Gabe and dad—are going up to visit the Grandparents in Maine, I’m sure we’ll get by. (I will now try to stop ending my sentences with prepositions.)

Next week we begin the next big travel phase, where Jenny flies to Chicago for a week and we go to Maine. This marks the first time ever that Gabe and Jenny will be apart for more than 24 hours. As I said before, it will be a learning experience for all of us. Gabe will learn to get by without Jenny, Jenny without Gabe, me without Jenny—lots of learning! But I think it will be overall beneficial. I’m glad she’s getting to go take advantage of her professional opportunities, but we will definitely miss her when she’s gone and we look forward to picking her up at the airport!

In any case, that’s for next week. This week, nothing “exciting” happened, unlike last week. (Update from last week: The dermabond has finally fallen off and the cut is healing well. I forgot how small the actual cut is.) Other than trying to keep his cut covered and out of the sun, there were some fun and interesting moments:

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#SummerofDad Week 8: Gabe’s Summer Souvenir

IMG_20150709_191606One of the main American stereotypes about fathers it that we’re more lenient, allow kids-will-be-kids mischief, and generally have a “light touch” when we’re parenting. There are definitely times when this is true of me, but there are others where I’m less lenient and Jenny is more hands-off. So it depends on the activity or issues at hand. And I enjoy that this nuance is true of our relationship and our parenting styles—I find it complementary (though it can lead to friction and disagreements). So, one thing I hate is when something happens to make it appear that I’m playing to the barely-vigilant American father stereotype. And something did happen.

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